Monday, March 04, 2013
Argh!
This is the portion of the program where Nikki gets really mad at herself for acting stupid!
Sigh. Why, why, why, why, why? Will I never learn???
I've been thinking about my attention whoring of the past few...um...YEARS and I'm a bit horrified by it all. Good grief!
This is what I meant by there being parts of my pre-surgery self that I miss. #ObeseNikki did not need constant texts, Facebook check-ins, POF surfing, email, Tweets and Google + to feel complete. She needed MAYBE a good book, an empty journal, an Erykah Badu CD and a good smelling incense.
WHAT THE HELL HAS HAPPENED TO ME???
It's like this self-involved...monster...has crawled in my gut and has taken over and I don't like that bitch very much. Don't get me wrong. That spirit in #ObeseNikki is still there. She's still fighting. SHE is the one telling me I don't need this bullcrap. That I am worthy of my own accord. That there's nothing in the quiet that will hurt me. That I LIKE being gentle with myself and that I end up feeling much better for it.
Sigh...#ObeseNikki mindset...I am rooting for you girl! Because something...oh yes SOMETHING...has gotta change.
Sigh. Why, why, why, why, why? Will I never learn???
I've been thinking about my attention whoring of the past few...um...YEARS and I'm a bit horrified by it all. Good grief!
This is what I meant by there being parts of my pre-surgery self that I miss. #ObeseNikki did not need constant texts, Facebook check-ins, POF surfing, email, Tweets and Google + to feel complete. She needed MAYBE a good book, an empty journal, an Erykah Badu CD and a good smelling incense.
WHAT THE HELL HAS HAPPENED TO ME???
It's like this self-involved...monster...has crawled in my gut and has taken over and I don't like that bitch very much. Don't get me wrong. That spirit in #ObeseNikki is still there. She's still fighting. SHE is the one telling me I don't need this bullcrap. That I am worthy of my own accord. That there's nothing in the quiet that will hurt me. That I LIKE being gentle with myself and that I end up feeling much better for it.
Sigh...#ObeseNikki mindset...I am rooting for you girl! Because something...oh yes SOMETHING...has gotta change.
# posted by Bariatric Foodie @ 1:23 PM 
