Sunday, February 21, 2010
Day 2: Mutany at the pouch!
After yesterday’s experience being able to eat a big ol’ salad, I am now sort of on guard for any other extraordinary pouch abilities.
To get my daily fluid intake, I usually keep big containers around in which I mix up Crystal Light to get my fluids. Well today I had a 1.5 liter bottle that used to hold Lipton Diet Green Tea. Well this morning I was thirsty so I’m sipping, and sipping, and gulping, and sipping…and before I knew it I was 8 oz. from finishing the whole bottle—that’s 50 oz. of fluids in less than 30 minutes!!!
This begs the question: wonder pouch or mutant pouch?
Since about month 6 post-op I’ve always been able to eat more than other post-ops. The beginning was rough for me with eating. First I could not eat very much and everything I did eat made me sick. Then I could (probably) eat more but I willfully chose not to (what happened to THOSE days, huh???). Now I eat. A bit too much I think, but not bad stuff, still…I eat.
The tricky part is learning not to develop insecurities about how much I can eat vs. how much weight I’ve lost. Were it not for my best friend Lee (who can eat as much as I can and is TINY) I would think that I had totally failed at this thing. That’s crazy of course because I’ve lost 150 lbs. But still…when in the vortex this means nothing. All that really matters is the fact that I don’t yet look like Beyonce, mkay?
This morning I did something I rarely do. I gave myself permission to have exactly what I wanted for breakfast the way I wanted to have it. I wanted peanut butter oatmeal. ½ c. quick oats + 1 tbsp of peanut butter + some Splenda and a little bit of sugar-free breakfast syrup and cinnamon (side note: if at this point you feel any inclination to post a comment about how you could NEVER eat that much, consider these loving words: suck it!). Anyway, love at first bite! I say this not to chronicle all my food choices for the day (cuz I’m not going to) but to say this: when you let your insecurities go for a minute, interesting things happen. The meal was 240 calories. Probably more carbs than I consumed in my entire first 6 months…and I was so satisfied that I didn’t think of food again until noon (I ate this at about 6).
This makes me wonder if half the battle with weight loss is neurosis? First let me say I am NOT advocating that everyone give themselves permission to eat endless amounts of Oreos or anything like that. There are some things that, when you are trying to lose weight, are just a universally bad idea. But I get neurotic about eating too many carrot sticks. Am I somehow sabotaging myself with these worries? I know worrying produces cortisol which makes people (especially women) hold onto fat so maybe I should go with a more “don’t worry, be happy” mentality. Over the past few years I’ve worked hard to change the types of food I like. I don’t like greasy, fried food. I don’t like white carbs. I’m much more excited by carrot sticks than I am about bread or pasta. And, yes, I love nuts and nut butters. So long as that stays the same…should I maybe lighten up a bit?
Interesting thoughts happening over here…
To get my daily fluid intake, I usually keep big containers around in which I mix up Crystal Light to get my fluids. Well today I had a 1.5 liter bottle that used to hold Lipton Diet Green Tea. Well this morning I was thirsty so I’m sipping, and sipping, and gulping, and sipping…and before I knew it I was 8 oz. from finishing the whole bottle—that’s 50 oz. of fluids in less than 30 minutes!!!
This begs the question: wonder pouch or mutant pouch?
Since about month 6 post-op I’ve always been able to eat more than other post-ops. The beginning was rough for me with eating. First I could not eat very much and everything I did eat made me sick. Then I could (probably) eat more but I willfully chose not to (what happened to THOSE days, huh???). Now I eat. A bit too much I think, but not bad stuff, still…I eat.
The tricky part is learning not to develop insecurities about how much I can eat vs. how much weight I’ve lost. Were it not for my best friend Lee (who can eat as much as I can and is TINY) I would think that I had totally failed at this thing. That’s crazy of course because I’ve lost 150 lbs. But still…when in the vortex this means nothing. All that really matters is the fact that I don’t yet look like Beyonce, mkay?
This morning I did something I rarely do. I gave myself permission to have exactly what I wanted for breakfast the way I wanted to have it. I wanted peanut butter oatmeal. ½ c. quick oats + 1 tbsp of peanut butter + some Splenda and a little bit of sugar-free breakfast syrup and cinnamon (side note: if at this point you feel any inclination to post a comment about how you could NEVER eat that much, consider these loving words: suck it!). Anyway, love at first bite! I say this not to chronicle all my food choices for the day (cuz I’m not going to) but to say this: when you let your insecurities go for a minute, interesting things happen. The meal was 240 calories. Probably more carbs than I consumed in my entire first 6 months…and I was so satisfied that I didn’t think of food again until noon (I ate this at about 6).
This makes me wonder if half the battle with weight loss is neurosis? First let me say I am NOT advocating that everyone give themselves permission to eat endless amounts of Oreos or anything like that. There are some things that, when you are trying to lose weight, are just a universally bad idea. But I get neurotic about eating too many carrot sticks. Am I somehow sabotaging myself with these worries? I know worrying produces cortisol which makes people (especially women) hold onto fat so maybe I should go with a more “don’t worry, be happy” mentality. Over the past few years I’ve worked hard to change the types of food I like. I don’t like greasy, fried food. I don’t like white carbs. I’m much more excited by carrot sticks than I am about bread or pasta. And, yes, I love nuts and nut butters. So long as that stays the same…should I maybe lighten up a bit?
Interesting thoughts happening over here…
# posted by Bariatric Foodie @ 9:27 AM 
